M.I.A.

It has been awhile since I have posted on here.  It has been a difficult few weeks around here and I just haven't felt like doing much of anything.

Justin and I found out we were pregnant about a month and a half ago.  We were extremely excited since we have been trying for baby #2 for awhile.  Everything was going great, went in for an ultrasound and found out that we were only having one baby (there was a possibility of multiples).  We scheduled another ultrasound for a week later to look for the heart beat.  I had a horrible, disturbing dream the night before the ultrasound and just woke up with an uneasy feeling.

We went to the appointment and the doctor was unable to find the fetus.  I immediately lost it and started sobbing.  He said it wasn't 100% a loss but it didn't look good.  He wanted us to come back in another week for another ultrasound to look again - needless to say WORST WEEK OF MY LIFE!  The one positive thing that came out of that week is the love we were shown by our family and friends.  I am so grateful for all of those people that were there for Justin and I - we are very lucky.

We went back in last week and again the doctor was unable to find the fetus and it was determined that I was going to miscarry the baby.  I wasn't happy to hear the news but was sort of relieved to finally have an answer one way or another - that waiting was torture. 

It has been a rough few weeks - lots of tears.  Thankfully I am feeling better each day and the sadness is slowly fading.  We keep reminding ourselves how lucky we are with one beautiful daughter, that is more then some people get.  We will get through this and come out stronger.

Ashley stayed home from school today because she was running a fever yesterday.  Neither one of us is feeling 100% today so we have just stayed in our pj's all day.  Justin went mountain biking with his friend after work and I am looking forward to him getting home and helping entertain Ashley!  I have a feeling it is going to be a low key night here tonight.